Posted by Karen on Sunday, 4 January 1998, at 11:05 p.m.
I understand. I have been there. I still am, sometimes. No one can understand, unless they too have been enveloped in that horrible fog that settles over everything. The weight, the physical pain is unbearable. I know. Even the colors of the sky are dull and gray. There is nothing that I can say to make you feel better. There is nothing that can be done to allow you to wake up tomorrow and rejoice. It just doesn't come that way (unless God intervenes) But, I can offer the same advice that a dear friend gave me last year, when I truly hit the bottom of the world.
Decide that you will read your Bible today. Even if it makes no sence, you can't follow any of it, and it certainly doesn't seem to help. That doesn't matter just yet, just read.
Take a GOOD multi-vitamin and extra B. Get them from the health food store, not the grocery store. Spend the extra money, you ARE worth it. Your family needs you. Get some St. John's Wart too. It will take 6 weeks before you see any improvement though, so don't stop even if it doesn't help.
Get up at the same time every day. Do not lie in bed if you are awake, get up. Also, go to bed at the same time every night. If you can't sleep, go to the living room and read briefly (1/2 hour or so) then go back to bed and try again. NO CAFFINE.
Try to get outside, even if it is just for 5 minutes and even if it is cold, every day, preferably when the sun is up high (noon - 2 p.m.)
Find someone you can talk too. This is really hard, I know. But, just talking to someone can sometimes help break the fog. It makes things seem more real.
If you can think of anything that will genuinely make you feel better, do it. (I have taken to wearing nail polish, foolish, since it just chips the minute I wash the dinner dishes, but it makes me feel like a person. For a while, I was into wearing blue mascara.) Dont' forget to take the trouble to get dressed every morning. It does help.
I am really sorry I have gone on so long. If you want to talk, I'm always here. I really would love to talk with you.
P.S. My church told me it was sin, too.