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Home » CHFWeb Forum » HotTopics » Bunny Trail from Encouragement and Instilling Values: Can You Raise Kids to Make Right Decisions?
Bunny Trail from Encouragement and Instilling Values: Can You Raise Kids to Make Right Decisions? [message #512095] Wed, 04 March 2009 13:21 Go to next message
Sherry in NH  is currently offline Sherry in NH
Messages: 9592
Registered: April 2005
Location: Small Town New Hampshire
Senior Member

The Raising Your Kids Poll[ 18 vote(s) ]
1.I think that you can raise your kids in a certain way to have a certain outcome 0 / 0%
2.I think that if you raise your kids right, that generally speaking you will have a certain outcome 0 / 0%
3.I think that if you raise your kids right that sometimes you will have a certain outcome 0 / 0%
4.I think that you do what you should as parents, but kids still have a choice 10 / 56%
5.I think that kids' choices are somewhat unrelated to how they were raised 0 / 0%
6.I think that it all depends on the parents and the kids 1 / 6%
7.Some combo 4 / 22%
8.Something else 0 / 0%
9.I think that any good outcome with kids is just a blessing of God 3 / 17%

I have heard parents say, almost in disbelief: We raised them in the way they should go...*why* are they making wrong decisions/walking away from the Lord/distancing themselves from the family/whatever??

Here's a poll:


In Jesus

Sherry from NH
Re: Bunny Trail from Encouragement and Instilling Values: Can You Raise Kids to Make Right Decisions [message #512112 is a reply to message #512095 ] Wed, 04 March 2009 13:57 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Leigh  is currently offline Leigh
Messages: 4572
Registered: April 2005
Location: Tennessee
Senior Member
The kid's choice has something to do with it. He's not a robot, after all. If the child has a warm and vibrant relationship with God, then the word takes root and God produces fruit. Parents can teach and make rules all they want, but if they are not sowing in fertile ground, well, the outcome would not necessarily be what the parents desire.


Leigh
Tennessee

"Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."

~~Benjamin Franklin

Re: Bunny Trail from Encouragement and Instilling Values: Can You Raise Kids to Make Right Decisions [message #512149 is a reply to message #512095 ] Wed, 04 March 2009 15:27 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Lisa R.  is currently offline Lisa R.
Messages: 14916
Registered: April 2005
Location: Georgia
Senior Member

I put some combo--I think #2 & #4 are both big ones...

Raising kids is not a "paint by number" affair where if you do X, the kids will do Y. You can get into issues of the elect and free will and all that, but I think we can all agree that having parents who do everything right is not going to overcome a child who doesn't know the Lord, ya know? The old saying about God doesn't have grandkids and all that---each one has to make a personal choice about walking in the light or refusing to

But I also see many parents who are claiming to do what is right, when you can watch them interact with their kids and see that they're not actually following scripture. They're good parents and good kids (societally speaking, not "we all fall short of the glory of God" speaking). But maybe they're only dealing with externals and not the heart, or maybe there's an inconsistency that they can't see (we all have our blind spots, after all!)

Anyway...I don't think it's a cut and dried proposition...but with the caveat in #4, I would think #2 is fairly accurate.


Blessings,
Lisa R.
Re: Bunny Trail from Encouragement and Instilling Values: Can You Raise Kids to Make Right Decisions [message #512188 is a reply to message #512095 ] Wed, 04 March 2009 16:43 Go to previous messageGo to next message
~Janice  is currently offline ~Janice
Messages: 8308
Registered: April 2005
Senior Member

Well, according to biblical promises such as:

Proverbs 22:6 Train a child in the way he should go,
and when he is old he will not turn from it.

... we directly influence how our children turn out. Of course they are 'free' agents and can turn away from what they know is right but for the most part I think we can rest on those promises.

The problem is that many parents want to get along more than they want to hold to values they know are right. So, that compromise can really damage a child. There is much character sacrifice on the road to "getting along" and being friends rather than parents. Among them are honesty. To me this is the most important.


TAKE TIME FOR FRIENDS!

Janice T. ~ CHF member since 09/97 ~
Mom to four - ds 28, dd 26, dd 24 and ds 21 - and wife to my sweet husband Richard.
Re: Bunny Trail from Encouragement and Instilling Values: Can You Raise Kids to Make Right Decisions [message #512209 is a reply to message #512095 ] Wed, 04 March 2009 17:30 Go to previous message
bwsmith  is currently offline bwsmith
Messages: 1472
Registered: April 2005
Location: Texas
Senior Member
# 4 & #9 are my answers.

Prov 16:33 The lot is cast into the lap , But its every decision is from the LORD.


You can't run away from trouble. There ain't no place that far. ~Uncle Remus

bwsmith
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